Where did March go?

March has vanished in the blink of an eye, hasn’t it?

Spring seems to have sprung.

I bought a ten-gallon container of bug spray at the local hardware store. Die, spiders, die!

I’m going to be barbequing up nice thick beef steaks on the old grill tonight to celebrate the arrival of Spring. Actually, I’m just going to skip the grill because I like my steaks raw and bloody!

I can’t wait to roll around in pesticide-laden turf grass. I just love the fresh smell of Round-up in the Springtime, don’t you?

I’m tired of being destitute, so I’ve bought shares in the oil and gas industry. Frack on!

I’ve decided to join the Republican Party because the far right could really use a nice warm hug right now! Poor rich politicians!

Oh, and big news! I’ve signed up to take shooting lessons at the local gun range in preparation for the awesome trophy hunt I’ve signed up for. Can’t wait until my maskless summer vacation! FREEDOM!

Let’s see, now, what else have I been up to?

Oh, yeah, just one more thing…

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HAPPY APRIL FOOL’S DAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!